I just about died when I saw this.

This is the cold open from the 2006 Prime-Time Emmy Awards. Conan O'Brien hosted.

Ack, this video is… uh… well, it's only marginally less… disturbing than that one where he was getting a massage naked…

I was laughing so helplessly…

A true, international golden god. Hey, I feel like some watermelon.

HAHAHAHAHAHA I CAN'T CONTAIN IT ANYMORE. I have a lawyer. His name is Sylvester. We've been working together since the fifth grade. And just now I decided that Jorge (HOR-hay, not Georgie) is the name of my professional hit man. A highly skilled contract killer who came into being shortly after I threatened Yachi with the usual "I'll kill you… in your sleep." Which segued into a long, Conan O'Brien-esque "There will be no physical evidence linking me to your murder. It shall be done. I will pay for it. And I will be blameless, blameless in the eyes of the international court…"

See, when you threaten people, you've got to make the "I'll kill you" part loud and menacing (preferably in a heavy metal death voice), then wait a few, uncomfortable seconds for that to simmer before springing the "in your sleep" bit in a low, intimidating hiss. Unfortunately, I haven't mastered the death threat sans the goofy grin yet, but it's enough to personally entertain.

Jorge is 100% pure Mexican, of course. Sylvester is just one of those run-of-the-mill sleazy white Americans, though — now that I think about it — possibly part Russian and Italian mafia. Gee… that would explain why he's so… lethal.

Damn, it's too perfect. I'm beside myself.

Hilarious clips from Conan O'Brien's trip to Amsterdam. Interrogating the locals and making a mockery of himself as always.

Part 1

Part 2

Favorite moment:
Ozzy: … why the glum face?
Conan: Ozzy Osbourne!
Ozzy: Let's go pick some tulips. C'mon.

Man, I love him.

Update: If you're outside the U.S. and can't view these videos, here's a segment from Late Night with Conan O'Brien about Conan's support for the Finnish president Tarja Halonen and his amusing TV ads for her re-election campaign.

The last episode of Late Night was aired on February 20, and Conan O'Brien is set to take over Jay Leno's The Tonight Show in June. You can watch other classic clips (including full episodes) on Hulu. In the meantime, I'll miss you, Coney! Good luck!