Hilarious clips from Conan O'Brien's trip to Amsterdam. Interrogating the locals and making a mockery of himself as always.

Part 1

Part 2

Favorite moment:
Ozzy: … why the glum face?
Conan: Ozzy Osbourne!
Ozzy: Let's go pick some tulips. C'mon.

Man, I love him.

Update: If you're outside the U.S. and can't view these videos, here's a segment from Late Night with Conan O'Brien about Conan's support for the Finnish president Tarja Halonen and his amusing TV ads for her re-election campaign.

The last episode of Late Night was aired on February 20, and Conan O'Brien is set to take over Jay Leno's The Tonight Show in June. You can watch other classic clips (including full episodes) on Hulu. In the meantime, I'll miss you, Coney! Good luck!

Being misanthropic, depressed, and constantly alienated, I do try to cheer myself up from time to time. One of the most common ways I do this is by finding some gem of a music video to drool over.

"Bye Bye Beautiful" by Nightwish, Dark Passion Play (2007)

Yes! You guessed it. Gorgeous models backed by even more gorgeous music. And I simply adore Marco Hietala, the guy who accompanies Anette Olzon in the duet, even despite his, uh, double goatee (is that a double goatee?). Such a sexy voice. And speaking of sexy, see that punk rocker-esque keyboard player with the black eyeliner? I realized (just yesterday) that he was the composer/lyricist/mastermind/genius Tuomas Holopainen himself. I seriously had no idea he was that dashing in real life.

"Amaranth" by Nightwish, Dark Passion Play (2007)

THE quintessential rock video. Really pop in disguise, despite the heavy riffing, but I'm not complaining. Beautiful, beautiful stuff.

As an aside, Dark Passion Play is the first of Nightwish's studio albums to feature their new vocalist, Anette Olzon of Sweden. Her predecessor, Tarja Turunen, was fired in an open letter in 2005. The majority of fans are still divided about the move, and I myself think the rest of the band's demeanor towards her was uncalled for. ("Bye Bye Beautiful": "Did you ever hear what I told you? / Did you ever read what I wrote you?" It's really a spiteful farewell song to Tarja.) However, though I greatly miss Tarja's operatic vocals (after all, classical singing can't be beat), I'm gradually warming up to a Tarja-less Nightwish. In the long run, it probably was the right decision, given that they were moving away from classical vocals anyway. And if they keep producing euro-metal gold like "Bye Bye Beautiful" and "Amaranth"… well, then, I'm OK.

"The Islander" by Nightwish, Dark Passion Play (2007)

Beautiful folk ballad. One of the most haunting and visually arresting works of fine video.

And that concludes your musical update from Jenny-fa.

HOLY FUCK I DID NOT REALIZE THAT TERMINATOR WAS ON TODAY. HOLY FUCK I ALSO DEFINITELY DID NOT REALIZE THAT TERMINATOR WAS ON LAST WEEK. 'Cause all of a sudden I look at the clock (8:37 pm) and I start screaming. And then my dad walks by and says, "Hey, I watched that show last Friday while you were sleeping. It was pretty interesting." And then I start screaming anew.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Now my integrity is ruined.

Several days ago, I noticed that somebody had scrawled the following words on the whiteboard in my calculus class:

Green apples and bananas

The same person also wrote "Groon ooples oond boonoonoos" and other variations to that effect, accompanied by some rather childish illustrations of what appeared to be smiling apples or watermelons. I couldn't really tell.

The thing is, "Green Apples and Bananas" is the name of a song, a singing exercise that a music teacher once taught us in elementary school. The idea was to substitute the vowel sounds in the song with the common vowel sounds ah, eh, ee, oh, oo (for the vowels a, e, i, o, and u) so that the students could practice enunciating them.

So, the original lyrics,

I like to eat, I like to eat,
I like to eat green apples and bananas.
I like to eat, I like to eat,
I like to eat green apples and bananas.

would be alternately sung as

Ah lahk tah aht, Ah lahk tah aht,
Ah lahk tah aht grahn ahpples ahnd bahnahnahs.

or

Ee leek tee eet, Ee leek tee eet,
Ee leek tee eet green eeples eend beeneenees.

I remember one particular kid (still a major goofball many years later, as a high schooler) would be jokingly reprimanded by Mr. ___ for singing "bikinis" instead of "beeneenees."

I remember because just a few days before, that teacher, who I hadn't seen since the fourth or fifth grade, had committed suicide.

"– My fall will be for you –
My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
If you be the one to cut me
I will bleed forever…"
— Nightwish, "Ghost Love Score"

This operatic chorus (featuring none other than the London Philharmonic Orchestra) is one of the most awesome hooks I've ever heard. Check it out.

"Ghost Love Score" by Nightwish, Once (2004)

Since I had a nice long nap today, I'm determined to spend the entire night (and early morning) catching up on my favorite shows on Hulu. And since I know you're just bursting with curiosity, the shows in question include (in approximate ranking of brilliance/preference):

1. House
2. Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
3. Legend of the Seeker — based on a series of fantasy novels called The Sword of Truth
4. And to a lesser extent, Fringe, which has gotten ruddy spectacular all of a sudden

In short, Alec Baldwin can be very persuasive.

On the other hand, I need to go wash my hair.

Edit: Dreamhost's $0.77/month hosting sale is still on, for those of you still interested.